Has it been that long?

2011 you say?
Can't quite believe it. I've actively avoided writing, not sure why.
What's changed? The only thing for sure I can say is I had a baby.
I think I may have gotten fatter too!

Just had the Police call

I felt sick.
I don't know if you've ever had the police knock at your door? Unfortunately I have, it was eleven years ago when my brother had that awful car accident.
So of course I was transported back to that experience.
They don't tell you why they are there. Probably for privacy. They ask to be invited in. I quickly explained that I was nervous because this had happened before and they assured me it was nothing like that (phew).
So then your mind races what could it be? I'd already killed off half my family in my head.
They told me the'd had an anonymous report of loud voices (basically possible domestic violence). I was asked who was in the house - my kids and my husband was in the back garden making sure the chickens had put themselves to bed (they're just getting the hang of it).
So I was asked to go get him. Which I did, trying to reassure him that it was nothing serious but the police were here!
We were split up and questioned. Not aggressively or anything but it seems I had a more thorough questioning than my husband.
My police officer  revealed that they'd had an anonymous phone call stating raised voices were heard and a woman's voice shouting at at child then smacking him. I felt sick
I was asked if i'd been hit, how long we'd been married, what time the kids went to bed, had there been any raised voices?
I explained that I have a 5 and 2 year old and they hadn't made any more noises than usual but they make a lot of noise (I feel sorry for my neighbours).
I hadn't even put them to bed tonight. But I honestly started questioning what I had done leading up to and around bed time.
Of course you also start thinking, who reported us?!
So 10/15mins later she left the room, and I waited.
As I looked around the room I wondered if she thought we had too few toys (i've read or watched that this sometimes indicates a lack of interest -or something- with your children) I'd packed most of them away in the play room.
All the while my husband is being questioned in the kitchen. He even offered, then let the officer check the kids out (he wasn't being questioned in relation to the children)
So I waited
She finally came back and told us she had the wrong address!
Thank God. But so scary.
I cried with relief when they had left. They were apologetic and I get why they had to be so thorough. However, a postcode check would have saved me having my heart in my mouth and got them to the right place.
I hope the child that possibly needed their help, got it.

If you are a Muslim

And I say salaams to you. Say it back!

I have a playroom!

Well a toy room.
It has been packed up with 'house stuff' since we moved in, and it is practically empty of non toy stuff and filled to the brim with kids toys!
Now all I have to do is continue to fill with toys and sort my living room out and make it into a grown up space.
One day I'll take pics and post ;)

PSA: BRIO ZENTO

Seems like I'm on a one woman crusade to highlight products that don't work or shoddy customer service.
My poor baby has a REALLY sore and bruised bottom today and we think it's down to the Brio Zento car seat that he uses.
We mostly do short trips in the car seat, but today we went back to Happy Chicks to return the poorly Cream Legbar. It's a 2.5 -3hr round trip depending on traffic etc.
My 2year old complained of having a sore bum on his return and kept flinching when picked up/asked to sit down. So my husband checked his bum thinking he had a sore rectum as he's had ongoing problems with having a poo and withholding said poos.
He couldn't see anything wrong so we carried on as normal.
At bathtime I decided to look at the cheeks of his bottom as he was still complaining and flinching when you touched his bottom. He looked to have bruises on the cheeks of his bottom and his lower back. He was born with a Mongolian blue spot so I questioned whether that was it (I knew in my heart that it wasn't but wanted to believe it was).
His bottom is bruised, badly :( We inspected the car seat and it is rock hard! We've never thought to inspect it in that way. My older son used the car seat for a while when he was younger, I just hope he was never subjected to such pain.
I can't believe that this happened! I feel I have subjected my child to an abuse. I strapped him into it daily, without a thought. Thank God when his older brother was not with us I let him use his car seat (kiddy comfort pro) so less pain for him I hope.
Upon Google-ing I found this thread. Seems it is a known problem. Maybe there's more info out there. It was enough for us. The car seat will be going in the bin!

Poor bird

It's lost so much weight and so quickly. I mean I handle them every day and the change has been almost overnight. Poor thing.

Tis alive!

It may have caught a cold/chill. It's breathing is much better and it seems to be getting better.
It had some tuna and I've bought some apple cider vinegar (ACV) and intend to give it some tommorow. It's great having a pet food shop so close!
I have heard - (somewhere) that apple cider vinegar is supposed to be a bit of a cure all in humans also (don't quote me on that).

I'm scared I'm going to find a dead chicken in the morning

The largest of my two chicks had laboured breathing tonight and I think maybe it's breast bone is protruding compared to its 'sister' :(
I'll be really sad as I've actually become attached and it's the more friendly of the two. Also, my eldest just named them after him and his little brother.
I really hope it's something and nothing.
I wasn't going to get chicks originally as  I know they are more susceptible to, well, everything. I didn't really want to expose my children to the very real possibility of losing a pet (well more than I had to iykwim)? But after looking after my cousins I thought it'd be a good experience, and it is. But I really hope it's something and nothing.

I'm officially a chicken mummy!

Picked up two cream legbar chicks today!!!! They are sooo sweet, pretty big seeing as though they are 4weeks old but they no longer require the heat lamp, so they came home with us (legbars are autosexing so you can tell their gender from birth because of a difference in feathers).
Hoping that we can handle them enough that they really become pets, and I can't wait to see what colour their eggs are!
We should be going back in a month to pick up some silkies which are supposed to be really child friend, and well silky lol!

Waffle

I was entrusted with taking care of my cousins chooks whilst she is away in France.
I went to check on them today and they were dead. I'm guessing a fox got them :( This is the second lot that have been had off by a fox and these weren't even in lay.

I'm so glad the kids didn't see as I reached the coop before they did Alhamdulilah they were accepting of us just going away, normally they would kick up a stink.

I had to phone my aunt and she's going to do the clean up. I'm  not looking forward to seeing my cousin and hubby. I feel awful for them.

Countdown to Ramadhan!

I'm not sure I've ever been excited about Ramadhan. Or it's been a while since I have.
I've been unable to fast for the past few years due to pregnancy and breastfeeding. But unfortunately I suffer from something called migraine belly . I do have pain in my head but my main symptom is the gastric stasis they speak of, which basically means that my stomach stops digesting. So I have to take I migraine tablet at the slightest hint of one.
To top it off the cause of my migraines are not eating properly.
Now if I didn't have children I could stay in bed or deal with the symptoms. But I cannot function properly when I have an attack.
It feels like such a cop out :( I know inshaAllah I'm excused from fasting, but this is a fundamental pillar of Islam.
I'm going to try to enter into the spirit of Ramadhan in every other way!
InshaAllah i'd like to experience Ramadhan and Eid in an Islamic country one day as I don't really know how big a deal it is.
So part of my list for this Ramadhan:
Read the Quran.
More Islam Channel
Talk to the kids about what i'm reading in the Quran, and the meaning of Ramadhan
Be nice!
Act like a Muslim
Prayers, prayers,prayers!!!!!

Did you know?

That mummy's kisses stay forever?
I was reliably informed by a good friend that no matter how hard my boys wipe their faces, my kisses remain!
This has been the best bit of news I have had in some time :)
Mwah!

Why is it so difficult?

Edited. As I have realised that we are not static. But ever evolving in our relationships.

32 years and a Radley bag

This is the beauty that I received as a prezzie from my big sis the other day! Completely out of the blue. I didn't even remember ever mentioning it to her :)

Not sure if I've ever mentioned my big sis before. We weren't brought up together. We have different mothers but a lot of things in common (other than our dad). She's a solicitor.

We took my bag, my youngest son and headed off to the antiques market where I had a ball! She's such an enabler. I'm glad I didn't have any money because I would have spent every last penny! (Apparently I like exclamation marks)!!

So my big sis bought my first Radley bag :) and I love it soooo much.

Cats, cats everywhere.....

Omgosh! There are THE most cats near my NEW house ;) I love it btw! (the house that is) I have lovely neighbours and we're at home here.
But what the hell are all the cats about? I mean i'm glad they're not dogs but why is it acceptable for your cat to roam about it my garden crapping as it goes?
Can you imagine if I hopped over your fence and did a turd on your lawn? Even if it was my dog (I don't have one btw) it would be totally unacceptable for me to allow my animals to roam around on your land and do as they please.
My husband discovered a cat roaming around the house the other day!
I feel I must state that I do like cats (although am allergic) but if I wanted to clean cat poop up i'd get one of my own! Get your cat out of my garden!!!!

Domestic sluttery

I love this blog. I love things they find (but I'm not cool enough to wear). The recipes that I'm never going to try and all the rest of the other stuff that i'm not going to do.

Mostly I'm using

My APLX (Angel pack LX - no idea what the LX stands for). My Zitai (Norweigan Mei tai) and I used my ever faithful Freehand (Kaire made) the other day :)
I'm always using wrap ring slings for quick up and downs. I have an Inka (THE best) and my lovely friend loaned me ulli. Both storches

Doodlehouse

So a while ago I raved about a coop that I saw on Ebay called a Doodlehouse (see previous post if you fancy it). So I ended up buying one from there then Ebay shop. Big mistake!!! Huuge mistake :(

Initially I stored it my mums, In the wrapper. She moved so I had to find a new home. I unwrapped it and treated it with wood preserver - I have to add at this point that (as I remember it) their Ebay listing professed that you *could* paint it but it didn't NEED painting.

I *think* mine is made of exterior plywood. At the time the bumf said something like....why don't we use marine plywood? Because rain doesn't have salt in it blah, blah, blah.
I'm getting pi$$ed off as I write.
Soon after they changed their product to marine ply, and have changed the materials again (hmm I wonder why)?
Oh and the most laughable part of it! I remember the listing saying something along the lines of....how they had been had by cheap/poor quality chicken coops and how they had to buy a new one soon after.
This had been why they had designed the Doodlehouse. So that other people wouldn't have to go through what they had (I'm writing this from memory so this is not the exact wording - I wish I'd taken a screenshot).
So, I treated the coop. Stored what I could indoors and one piece could not fit so I left it outside.
However, it is a coop and that's where it's going to be used so what's the problem you ask?

It weathered awfully. Awfully I tell you! It was outside for one winter and has been stored outside for just over a year.
Here are some pics:

Do you think this is how a chicken coop should look after such a short time outside? Without the added stress of chicken poop and pee!!! I don't!
It looks shocking and I so wish I'd waited a bit longer and bought an Eglu or Cube from Omlet. I didn't rush into this purchase. I researched, I waited, I researched some more and bought within my budget. Fat lot of good that did!!


But in my opinion that's not the worst part. I contacted Doodlehouse and at first the emails seemed positive. I was offered a discount towards a new Doodlehouse. Which I appreciated, it's just that I can't afford a new Doodlehouse, even with a discount. I could have bought an Omlet Cube with the money that i'd spent in total (if i'd have bought another)!
So I told them that sent pictures and also stated that I didn't think the coop was fit for purpose. I mean, a coop made in Britain that can't stand up to British weather in my opinion is not fit for purpose! Look at the state of it! It's not going to improve with age!!! Grrrrrr

Would you like to know their response?
To IGNORE me.
No answer, nada, nothing, zilch.
Erm, great customer service there.
So what do I do?
Resend the email.
No reply.
What the hell is that about?
So they sold me a dud coop and then ignore me when I try and tell them about it.

My advice to anyone who is thinking of buying one is to think again. Their new coops maybe the dogs whatsits, but if you have a problem that's when you'll be left hanging.
Buyer BEWARE!!!!

Ok, so I went AWOL

I'm afraid I had to but I will explain. I have so much to say but I currently have a nursing child (that's weird to write down) on my lap. But I am in my new home!!!!!!! Woohoo :)

How do you become the person you want to be?

I see her. She's pretty far away and I don't know how to reach her.
How do you do it?
I seem to fail at every hurdle.
I'm not the woman, wife, mother, daughter or friend that I want to be. I try, but I don't strive.
I know it is within me me yet I take two steps forward...
Oh God, please help me to be that person.